Friday 5: Ill Fits

Friday 5 time! I’m gonna make this a quick one. I need to get to work on a post researching “how to prepare for the Dirty Girl Mud Run.”

What item in your wardrobe do you wish was better-fitting?

I have a pair of jeans I really love, Victoria Secret Blue London Boyfriend jeans. They are button-fly, 100% cotton, and a size 12. I bought them over ten years ago, back before VS started putting spandex in all their jeans. VS still makes the boyfriend jeans but they have spandex. I loathe spandex in jeans, even a measly one or two percent. These old jeans fit well when I bought them and I loved the way they made my butt look. My weight has…fluctuated since then. But I’m getting closer!

 

What role in a play, musical, or television program would be a terrible fit for you but is still something you wish you could try?

Any musical would be a terrible fit for me because I can’t dance. Oh, I can wiggle my butt with the best of them…but I suppose it’s more correct to say I can’t remember dance step sequences. Also I’m not a great singer. Not hideous, but not great.  And sing and dance at the same time? Fuggedaboutit.  So while I would LOVE to bust some evil moves as Ursula the Sea Witch or get my gospel rock on as one of The Muses in some local Disney musical stage production, it probably ain’t happenin’. Fortunately for me, this is not as yet a thing here. That I know of.

But it's happening somewhere. Broadway! Gods, I love that dress.

 

Which furnishing in your home clashes most with the others, for whatever reason?

None of our furnishings really match, but I'd say the couch is the thing that clashes the most It used to be owned by the old man who lived next door. It's a sort of blue plaid that supposed to resemble a quilt somewhat. The fabric is very durable and the construction style scream "traditional yet eighties!" It's a very solid couch.

 

What item in your possession are you using for something other than its intended purpose?

Thinking…thinking…I’m sure there must be something, but I don’t know of anything big. I use lots of things as bookmarks that weren’t made as bookmarks. Receipts, pictures, ribbons, etc. I’m not averse to thinking outside the box for utility of anything…if it works, use it. But I don’t currently keep my pipe tobacco in a Persian slipper on the mantle, if that’s what you’re looking for.

What’s something others expect of you that you are just not comfortable with?

Making small talk with strangers. Making eye contact with strangers. Really, just because I’m walking down the road I gotta wave at you? Why? I don’t get this. I don’t understand why it’s considered “polite” to acknowledge a person’s presence. Yeah, there you are, I see you. Why are you making such a big deal out of this? Why do you feel the need to speak to me? I’m THINKING.